About a year ago, a friend shared the following quote after a misunderstanding between us in which I apologized for: “Apologizing doesn’t always mean that you’re wrong and the other person is right. It just means that you value your relationship more than your ego.” I was caught off guard by the quote because it changed my perspective of apologies. She viewed my apology as a significant building block of our professional relationship versus me admitting fault and her parading around declaring her innocence. Originally I saw apologizing as being the weaker person, the person in the wrong, and/or a gesture I wanted to avoid at all cost. Since reading this quote and reflecting on it, I have come to value the act of apologizing more, regardless of who initiates it first. I see it now as a growth opportunity for my friendships, professional relationships, and marriage. Since the rift usually entails a misunderstanding, miscommunication, and/or simply, holding different perspectives, I find there’s no point in wasting time and energy on pondering who’s right or wrong and experiencing negative emotions in the interim. Alternatively, (as mentioned earlier) I now try to address it right away and taking responsibility for my area of fault. This is still a work in progress for me, but I am proud to share that the time I allow between me and another person consequent of a rift is shorter because I understand the power of apologies in building my relationships in my personal and professional world.
Is this a new perspective for you or have you always known this? What resonates with you about the power of apologizing?