Recently I asked someone, “How are ___ and ___ doing?” The person rattled off a list of new adventures the couple had been on in the last year, how their last gathering went when they last saw them (nearly a year ago), and a few other surface level updates. Comes to find out, a lot of their information sharing was based on Facebook notifications and text messages! From my perspective, what’s unfortunate is that this has become the new direction our friendships are being watered, along with viewing blog updates. It is much easier to hear about my friends’ updates by logging online through these different mediums and be updated pronto. Then if I wanted to take it a step further, we could converse via wall posting, private messaging, and/or commenting on their blog. I miss how in the past, (my idea of) quality friendships were characterized by spending time physically together and/or speaking on the phone, discussing meaningful details about our lives. Thus, in line with this thinking, I decided to temporarily walk away from my Facebook account about two years ago because I wanted to focus on maintaining quality friendships like I used to in the past with my truest, bestest friends. This approach took a lot more time and effort, but it brought more love and richness into my life. I truly got to connect with my girl friends. It also reminded me that it was unnecessary to have 200+ friends on Facebook, and that the reality is that only a handful of people actually cared about how I was doing and what I was doing. I have now signed back onto Facebook, but now have a renewed perspective on building quality friendships. I will admit I do start diverting back to my old ways of maintaining them, but then I try my hardest to get back on track. I understand that it will always be a challenge in this “busy” world, and I am sure it will get worst when our baby arrives.
How do you maintain quality friendships? Do you have additional thoughts on this topic?