I have everything I need

Many people know me as a thrifty person. I have no idea where I got it from because my parents didn’t teach me to be this way. They’ve always bought things they needed and of quality. I, on the other hand, fell into the quantity over quality trap when growing up. I’d buy many cute, low cost clothes to have options but really I didn’t wear them all. Along the way I also fell into the habit of buying anything on sale that fit me well. I didn’t necessarily need it or love it, I just bought it because it was difficult to find clothing that didn’t need to be hemmed given my petite size. Lastly, I bought and accrued things when they were given to me for free and/or I came across at a low, dirt cheap price. Again, I didn’t need the items at the time, I just held onto them for future use if need be. All these tendencies about me have been brought to my attention as I’ve opened my eyes to notice that God provides everything I need. I’ve always known this and it’s written in the Bible, but really, I wasn’t living according to it. Instead, as I’ve mentioned, I was hoarding things for when I “might” use it, taking and taking from others, and buying things to store in advance to save money. All this took time, energy, and thought but lacked trusting God. So I decided to do something about it and decided it was time to purge our belongings. It’s amazing to think that I found things to donate given that we live in a small unit and we’ve been in Australia for a year and moved here with few things. I guess it speaks to how easy it is to live in clutter.


  To help my initiative, which mostly pertained to purging clothes and toys, I was inspired by Marie Kondo’s tidying tips. She speaks about holding each item and asking yourself if it sparks joy in your life. Doing this emptied nearly half my closet. I finally donated items I’d been holding onto because they were in new condition, I spent a lot of money on, or want to fit into but just don’t. I thought it’d be hard to part with them, but since doing so, I feel a lot lighter. I am hopeful someone else can score a bargain and be blessed by my donations. When it came to donating toys, that was easier for me. I go back and forth on whether Zane has too little toys, but I fought this thought by telling myself he has enough for now.
  Consequently, this leads me to my newfound trust that God truly provides us what we need, when we need it. If I need something, I do not need to work hard to find the best deal to obtain it. I don’t think I’ll ever pay full price for an item, but I don’t need to search endlessly for a good deal or shop in advance for future needs. God has shown me that in His miraculous ways, he delivers. I won’t go into details but do trust me that He has it all planned out already as to what you need to have enough. This new conviction has brought me a lot of peace and time!


  As for other news, here’s our two-month-old Azalea and big brother Zane! All they need from me is love and their basic needs met. :-)

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my joy of having a second child

Hi! It’s been so long since I’ve written. There are many evenings I want to write, but by the time 7pm rolls around, I am exhausted! I wanted to finally write to introduce Azalea Choun Pirotta to you all, especially if I haven’t had a chance to write or message you the news. She was born July 10 and is one month tomorrow! Wow! She is a tiny one, but nonetheless strong and equipped with functioning lungs. 😉 When Daniel announced we had a girl in the operating room, I was overjoyed! To now have a daughter after having a son, I am looking forward to the new adventure and the special mother-daughter bond. And of course the shopping sprees.

The journey to bringing A into the world was quite an interesting one for me. Having a child in a new healthcare system had its pros and cons since I was comparing it to the US system, namely with the doctors and hospital care I had access to in San Diego. Here in AU, I did not have a consistent doctor. I must’ve encountered at least six doctors during all my visits. The lack of consistency and retelling of my last birth story took away from my desire to form a relationship with a doctor during this meaningful and intimate journey. Further, the doctors were very cautious about the growth of A. No one could handle that A would be a small baby and that Daniel and I just make small babies. The minute my scans showed decrease in her growth and amniotic fluids (this happened on two different ultrasounds), red lights were flashing and removing A was time sensitive. Luckily we were able to wait two weeks before her due date to deliver her by cesarean. Despite the constant surveillance of the doctors and midwives, the many blood work, migraines, and one trip to the emergency room (when I had chest pains due to a vaccine), I felt very much taken care of and A is a blessing to have in our family.


On a different front, before A’s arrival, I experienced a lot of anxiety about how I’d manage two children, especially with Zane not being in daycare or having help during the day. I must’ve had anxiety about it for a good month or two. I’m not an anxious person, so I knew I had to rid myself of it asap before I drove myself crazy. I prayed about it and changed my perspective and thanks be to God, a month before she arrived, I was overcome with peace. I got to enjoy Zane more and prepare for A. Even when I was told I needed to have an emergency cesarean one month prior to her due date (which didn’t come to fruition), I was calm and at peace.

It’s only been a month of adapting to life with two kids, and so far, so good. The peace I just spoke about has carried itself with me into this new normal. I have less time for myself, if at all, and every moment I’m always prioritizing and strategizing to achieve tasks, routines, and each kids’ safety. I definitely am thankful for the help I’ve received from family, friends, and especially my husband. Each helping hand helps. I also think I adapted better the second time around because I’m calmer about everything baby and haven’t cracked open a book or read too much online about their development. I’m more present with getting to know our new baby versus aligning her with what the books say. Additionally, because I’ve surrendered and embraced my role as a stay-at-home mom now, adding a second child to the home means more work but my job is still the same. I reckon adapting to one child and sacrificing oneself (with intention and love) was way harder for me.


There will be, and has already been, tough days with two but since A has entered our lives, Daniel and I feel our family is “whole.” We are overjoyed with how blessed we are and are cherishing our family time. Zane adores his sister and has adapted well to embracing her in our family. Thanks all for your prayers and continued love.

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i can’t do it all

I have this continual area for growth that has to do with trying to excel in all areas of my life. I want to be a good wife, mother, sister, daughter, server in Christ, friend, and more. Then somewhere among serving others and running (and cleaning) a household, I want to take care of myself and preserve who I am. Lots of work I tell ya! And I actually don’t think it’s that possible to excel in all, especially if I’m taking care of Zane full-time, pregnant, preparing for baby #2, and have high standards. This has been my struggle for nearly a decade now. When it first surfaced I wasn’t a mom, but instead a university student and working outside the home. Now being a mom I find my energy and time has depleted drastically that I can no longer operate at the same level pre-Zane. So what exactly is my problem? I’m still trying to figure it out! Maybe it is people pleasing? Maybe it is my goal of being that exceptional Christian wife and woman that I study about? Maybe I’m trying to prove something? I’m not certain? All I know is, operating as such with less breaks, a husband trying to build a business and working long hours, and me suppressing my own need for self-care or self-indulgence inevitably leads me to a meltdown. (It also doesn’t help that I’m hormonal these days). So how do I address and take care of myself when I start going downhill?

A. Me time, doing something I enjoy. This past weekend I got to run errands to shops I don’t normally go to because having Zane in tow would make it miserable.

B. Communicate with Daniel about how I’m honestly feeling and letting him know concisely what I need from him (aside from cuddles).

C. Talk to a friend who ‘gets it’ and strives for the same goals as a good woman.

D. Indulge in yummy specialty food, snacks, and drink. :-)

E. Have a nice cry. Giving myself permission to sob like who knows what.

F. Pray to God and commit (again) to reading daily devotionals.

I’m definitely not done growing in this area because it’s hard to kick a habit of being an overachiever if it’s in my blood. However, I need to learn to let some things go (a tidy house 100% of the time), not serve everyone, and put me first sometimes. I hope if you can relate that this self-disclosure has helped you.

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